Thursday, September 30

The truth of the matter is I'm not that strange.

People glare at me and acquaintances hug me to check for bones. They aren't disgusted; and if they are, it's only digusted at themselves for being jealous.

This isn't arrogance. This isn't weird anorectic thought processes. This is truth.

I try to hide going on nothing, but it's rough and they are jealous of that, too. I know they watch me drink diet dr peppers like water and curl up against someone, too tired to move.

They want what they think I have. Control. Thin. Social standing. A body I'm dying for. They think if they had my will-power they could stop before it got this bad.

The truth is they don't know anything. They have no idea how lucky they are to have a body that cooperates, that works like it should. A body that knows how to digest food and build muscle and fuel the brain. Don't fuck it up.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

we all take for granted simple processes of the body. i love listening to other people play... but can't 'digest' the notes myself because my hands and wrists don't do that. it sucks. and i'm sorry. :-/
smile on the outside

September 30, 2004 at 4:55 PM  

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